The Jobey on...

My personal blog. This is where I unwind and just talk about random things I want to talk about...basically, it's here to clog the blogosphere with useless information...

Tuesday, January 31, 2006

"No Action" by Elvis Costello

An Orange and Cream Slurpee with some Captain Morgan can really spice up the State of the Union address. Here's a list of quotes from the speech...my quotes, that is:
  • Is that Derek Jeter sitting next to Leiberman? What the fuck?
  • Holy shit! Obama is asleep!!!
  • Hillary doesn't look impressed by that Patriot Act remark...but damn she looks good tonight.
  • Bill's gon' be hittin' dat shit tonight, son.
  • Wait. Is that chick blind?
  • Is McCain sitting next to Coburn? I just lost a lot of respect for him. Tons.
  • Rejects amnesty? FLIP-FLOP!!!! FLIP-FLAAAWP!!!
  • Don't even grandstand like that, you mother fucker! You know you don't give a shit about women's health!
  • Nuc-u-ler! I heard it!!!
  • Laura Bush is kinda cock-eyed. There, I said it.
  • Democrats! Stand the fuck up! He's talking about reviving the American Dream!
  • Oh. Nevermind. He's awake.
  • Ah, yes, the optative when calling for God to bless America. Good job.

I think I created a new drink: The State of the Union. A medium Orange Creamcicle Slurpee and as much Captain Morgan Spiced Rum as you need to sit still for the whole speech. Thank you. Now back to my regularly scheduled Latin homework.

The Jobey Poll

What'd ya think of dat bullshiiiit?

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

"Should've Been in Love" by Wilco

on disc golf and life
I shot +2 at Colonial today. It seems like I play better when my mind is burdened. I shot par there when I had a lot on my mind. I threw some of my longest drives after my near nervous breakdown. And now I shot +2.

Friday, January 20, 2006

"In a Young Man's Mind" by The Mooney Suzuki

I went out and bought a 40 of O.E. and a 24 oz. of Smirnoff Ice at midnight. It was great. Tonight should be, in the words of Dave Chappelle as Don King, schpediforous. Yeah...that's all I got. I'm suffering from my first legal hangover right now.

Sunday, January 15, 2006

"Next Lifetime" by Erykah Badu

on brakes
Getting brakes put on my car is turning out to be very difficult. It's lame. It shall be done though. Mark my words. I just want it done now, but parts stores and garages decided they don't want to cooperate, I guess.

on beer
Beer es muy bueno.

on the new soccer jersey I got yesterday at the thrift store
Pretty boss.

The Jobey Poll
How are you celebrating MLK Day?

Wednesday, January 04, 2006

"Darek H. Latta is the 6th Biggest Cock in the World" by Toby Queef

For the record, Darek is not that big a cock, but that's the name of the song and that's the last position he took on the list. The Administration was No. 1, followed by the temporarily-named J-Knob, Jr., Ron Jeremy and Lexxx Steele. Since I had a couple shots of schnopps, my readers will have to figure out the rest of the list for themselves. Also, just because I was playing a solo show does not mean TQ/HC is breaking up.

on 'holy shits!'
Holy shit! I like the shit out of my car.
Holy shit! That dude's remains were on the ceiling fan.
Holy shit! I still haven't copied those CDs from the library.
Holy shit! They were due yesterday.
Holy shit! My new 25" by 42" duffle bag is big.
Holy shit! I still haven't been able to enroll.
Holy shit! I still haven't moved back to Norman.
Holy shit! If you're having a party, call me a few hours in advance.
Holy shit! 16 days until my birthday.
Holy shit! Return of the dual B-day celebration, sans shitty enchiladas? Hmmm.
Holy shit! The Strokes' new album is good.

on music
"Positively 4th Street" by Bob Dylan and "Somebody I Used to Know" by Elliott Smith. That's all you need to know.

on the last great quote of 2005
"What'd he do? Tea-bag ya?"
Said by me to Chris Johnson in regard to Nick Bagley with out even knowing what they were discussing or looking up from the guitar I was tuning.

on the greatest (fake) quote of 2006 about that quote
"Uh, he said something about, like, coffee filters."
Chris Johnson to Darek Latta in Paul's mind.

The Jobey Poll
Best memory of the Stach. Go.